Whether or not we believe in them, or follow them, we all know that there is a certain set of 'rules' – some spoken, some unspoken – that accompany the dating game. Ideals such as 'Don't contact him unless you have something to say' or 'Wait 2-3 days after a date before talking again' or 'Never break up with someone online, through a text message or ... on a post-it.'
The inherent nature of online dating – the way you’re introduced to others and how you communicate before you ever meet in person – is constantly redefining the classic approach to meeting people. Naturally, it’s also redefining these typical rules and worries that accompany classic dating. Not all of them, of course. You really shouldn’t call him unless you do have something to say. But some of the fundamental anxieties we grew up with, say things we might have learned from the original 90210 or even Sex and the City, are changing. The way in which you meet is digital, and so now, the lines of communication become much more so, as well.
No longer are you necessarily left waiting three days for him to call you again after your amazing first date. In this new digital realm, it wouldn't be unusual if you two IMed or texted the following day. Follow the same common sense you would in talking offline, though. Think about what you’re going to say before you say it. Are you sure he’ll think that LOLcat is funny?
Exchanging phone numbers doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll talk on the phone frequently. It does mean, however, you can send him sexy one-line texts on the go (when you’ve reached that level of comfort), or tell him via message, and not awkward 37-second phone conversation, that you’re going to be five minutes late.
Yes, e-communication may seem unconventional when it comes to dating, and it won’t be the case for everyone, but think about it from this perspective: Taking advantage of our digital world beyond the introduction adds a new dimension of connection to your dating adventures and can actually allow you to get to know the person more quickly.
Do you have your Gmail or IM software up all day while you’re at work? Probably. Could you chat on the phone sporadically throughout your work day? I highly doubt it! So with the lovely invention of IM and email, you can carry on conversation, or perhaps plan the next date, even when you can’t physically talk.
If you’ve already made it this far in the online dating world, you’ve got to let go and embrace all the change (and for some, challenges) it presents you. And most of all, have fun with it!